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Sunday, October 28, 2012

It's like I'm a real person now, because.........

I haaaaaaave a Facebook paaaaaaggeeeee........ (or my skin care product "line" does...) LIKE ME!!!!!  Maybe when I'm super fancy pants, I'll have fun things to give away.  Free beauty products that are good for your skin AND the environment? What more incentive do you need?!?!?!?!?

Go here and let me love your body all over.

Saturday, August 25, 2012

I'm going to clean you real good.

Photo courtesy of Vintage Love Photography, 2008.

<----- Look how soapy and deliciously clean I am! Know why? It’s cause I made some soap.  And I used it.  (Actually, that picture was taken about 4 years ago, but it goes with the theme of the post.)

Some of you may have heard me talking about making soap, and some of you lovely people have actually used it when you became my testing bunnies during my trial run.  Some testimonials include:

“I LOVE the soap!” –SanDee  (Ms. Crazy-Dry-Skin-hasn’t-needed-to-use-lotion-since-she-started-using-it)

“It feels like I’m washing with squishy angel babies!” –Ginger

So after months and months of tears and experiments (and WAY too much money), I finally have my first batch ready for sale!!!! YAAAAYYY!!!!

Let me tell you a little about my freaking awesome soap, if you aren’t already familiar with it.

1.  It’s 100% natural goodness.  Which means, only natural ingredients.  (Did you know that the "soap" you buy at the grocery stores can't even legally be CALLED soap, because it's actually detergent? And it's made of all kinds of scary chemicals and dead animals and the souls of babies?)  Even BETTER though: It doesn’t even TOUCH anything unnatural.  I use all non-synthetic, BPA free equipment and natural, sustainable materials during “production”.  As in, no plastic molds, no plastic blenders, and the little waste I produce is recyclable or compostable.

2. No excessive packaging to add to landfills! Woohoo!  I’ve thought for a very long time about labels…. And decided that it would take way more paper than I’m comfortable using to actually “package” the bars.  So the only thing that will be on the soap is a tiny piece of twine with a tiny tag on it that tells you what it is and how to get more.  So you don’t even have to throw the tag away, you can give it to someone else SO THEY CAN GET SOME SOAP TOOOOOO!!!!!!  All the ingredients and other info will be listed on either my blog, or Facebook, or both…. Or my website when I figure out how to make that happen and when I have some more products.

3.  You know how most natural soaps are like $7.00 bucks? And some of those aren’t even 100% natural?  I’m totally not gonna rape you just cause you want to get clean without poisoning yourself.  My soap is a whopping $4.00.  WIN!!!!!!!

4. Um, hello, I made it.  And you love me.  What more do you need?


The kind I have available right now is Lavender and Tea Tree.  There are 12 bars made at this very moment (first come, first serve, baby!).  They are $4.00 a bar.  They will rock your world.

Ingredients: Coconut Oil, Olive Oil, Canola Oil, Saponified Sodium Hydroxide (that’s not bad, I promise), Water, Lavender Essential Oil, Tea Tree Oil.

The only animal on which these are tested is my husband.

Message me on Facebook, email me at, or call me to tell me how excited you are about buying my soap.  I will hand deliver it to you with a big hug. (Unless you live far away, then I will ship it to you with a picture of me inside giving you two thumbs up REALLY intensely.)

Coming soon: several more amazing soap recipes, lotions, lip balms, skin care, body scrubs, and more!  I understand if you need to go lie down and fan yourself now.

Thanks for your support!!!!!!!!!
Photo courtesy of Vintage Love Photography, 2008.

Ducky loves this soap cause it doesn't pollute his pond.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

The Closet Debacle

What's up.

So, remember 67 years ago when I said I fixed my closet problem? Here are the deets, in case anyone out there cares about my home improvement adventures.  But a very cool idea, stolen from someone else's WAY more interesting and creative blog.

I live in a house built in 1900.  There was a tiny closet, but they had to tear it out to make room for the handicap bathroom, since this is an office as well.  If only they had known it would leave me with no place to put my excessive wardrobe.  (Which has actually been recently downsized in a gigantic way, but that's another story for another day.)  So for many moons, we've struggled with clothes storage experimentation.  Shelves, metal "closet" storage (UGH), plastic tubs..... it was all TERRIBLE.  We put up an entire closet storage/shelving/rod system on one wall.... and a month or two later, I ripped the whole thing down in a rage of desperation.  And settled for this:
So I thought, if I could just rig something up to the ceiling so I still have floor space, and that looks sort of natural and aesthetically pleasing, that would be ideal.  Here's what I (and that other guy from the way cooler blog) came up with:
Wrap leftover metal closet rod in jute for like 9 hours
hang from ceiling using butterfly hooks and equal lengths of looped jute

don't forget the hole in the rod... a little tricky but doable with the magic of a hot glue gun.

I opted to hang the bar in three places.........and it was really difficult to get the jute loops the same length, so the middle one was a little loose.  I figured the weight of the clothes would compensate for the slack.
Aaaahhh, look how awesome I think I am!!!!!
But clothes are heavier than you may think...........
Suddenly there was a loud snap.  And then there was no more middle support.

But I did get a nice big black hole in the ceiling out of the deal.
In the end, I re-hung the center support, tied it tighter, and glued all the knots for a little extra oomph.  It's been up for a few months now, and there have been no more catastrophes.  And I had room to move the dresser under the clothes, and opened up a shitload more space in the room.  Win!

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Random Shit That May or May Not Suck

So, I found a bunch of pictures from projects I never posted about.  I promised to document my journey, so here you go:

1.) Dom's acoustic guitar.  He wanted something dark and brutal on the front.  Like a cemetery.

"Wouldn't it be awesome if you painted something ridiculous on the back? So that at the end of a hardcore song, I could flip my guitar up and you'd see, like, a Lisa Frank picture?"


 2.) Paper Stars.  I found a template online, and figured I'd give it a shot.  It was easy, for the most part, but getting that last cone attached with no space between the points....that will require a lot more attention if I ever make these again.  I didn't bother punching holes in them for lights or anything.  I just wanted to see if I could make the actual body.


3.)  Attic.  It's gone through several transformations now.  But the entire thing is covered in Tyvek, and I've painted and built several shelving units. 
This is me painting like the BILLIONTH shelf.
This is how I felt about it.
Building shelves for my art supplies.

4.)  The sunporch.  No longer slated as a child's bedroom, I figured I'd paint it anyway as planned. 
Before, the terrible "pank" (some weird combination of pink and salmon) that is actually called "Beautiful Apricot".  Yeah right.

Now a beautiful grey.  But I still hate painting.

 Okay I think that's all for now.  Coming up: I just fixed my closet problem, and have completed my first round of soap experiments.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

The Man Cave Saga

Dom's birthday was on April 6th, and I decided that since I utterly failed Christmas, I should make up for it with an epic birthday present.  Recalling a long ago comment he made about how awesome it would be to have a table with a Ouija board top.... I set to work.  Eventually he's going to redo his man cave (with my decorating expertise assisting him, of course).  I figured this might be a welcome addition.

After searching several second-hand stores for a coffee table I could sand, I was starting to get a little hopeless.  They were all too big or too expensive.  I finally went to that woodcraft store where you can get unfinished furniture.  They had coffee tables, but they weren't cheap.  The place is also an antique store, and I just happened to notice an antique black trunk tucked under a table.  I dragged it out and got away with paying $62 bucks for a $98 trunk.  WOOT!!!!!!

Getting up into the attic where I have all my supplies was proving impossible.  I finally had to take the top off, using a butterknife to unscrew the ancient screws.  (A flathead screwdriver was too thick.) I felt like I was desecrating some sacred object, but I pressed on.  With my amazonian strength, I heaved the two pieces up the ladder into the attic, and set to work sanding the black paint off the top.  (Note: Do not power sand in an attic if you can help it.  Clean-up is a bitch.)

When it looked good and old, I gathered up my supplies.  Picture of a Ouija board surface, pencil, Sharpie, wood burner, measuring tape, and calculator.

I had to put to use all kinds of math that I didn't know I remembered.  It was like when you're in high school and think "when the hell am I ever going to need to know this?!?"  Well.  You'll need it when you make a Ouija board coffee table.  It's such a big surface with so many details that I had to measure the piece of paper with the picture on it first.  I had to figure out how big the space and letters were, and how far apart they are, and then calculate what that would equal on the trunk.  Woof.

So I finally figured it out, and penciled out the whole drawing.  Once that was done, I filled in everything with a Sharpie so I could see it.

When it was complete, I set about the tedious task of woodburning every....single.....detail.  It was hard, it was sweaty, I broke my burning tips several times... but in the end it made it very authentic and awesome.



And his reaction made all the hard work totally worth it.  "Best. Present. Ever."


Sunday, April 15, 2012

New Adventure!

Alright, the time has come to stop being LAME!!!!  I am taking on a new, epic adventure.  I'm going to attempt to make soap! "That's random", you might say.  And you would be right.  I was up in my craftypants lair (a.ka. The Attic), being bored and frustrated that I wasn't inspired to make anything.  I started browsing through one of my books, and stumbled across a chapter on how to make soap.  I thought, "hey, I could do that.  I already have most of the stuff, all I would need to get started is a bar of natural soap and some essential oils."  Because really, who wants to put all that chemical crap on their skin? I know a bit about the properties of different essential oils and herbs, why not add it to natural, chemical-free soap and make my OWN good-for-me skin products?

So, I went and bought some oils and some soap to start with (I'm not quite ready to make it from scratch.  Handling lye is a dangerous process.)  Tonight is the trial run! I have two experiments going right now, and my counter is covered with crap.  I'll keep you updated on the mess I'm making, and whether it worked enough to clean my hands at least.

I have a bunch of ideas to add to my still-lingering greeting card ideas... they include soaps and lotions and massage oils and such..... maybe one day, when I finally get all this right, I will have a booming, money-making Etsy store and home shop.  I will be the cliche story of cute, craftsy girl that says "I don't want all that lame, chemical-loaded crap from the drug store! I want something that I can feel good about putting on my body!", and, through trial and error, makes her own FABULOUS beauty product line, starting out of her attic and growing to HER OWN SHOP! IN A CUTE, FARM-Y COTTAGE!!!! WHICH MAKES A BAGAZILLION DOLLARS EVERY DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stay tuned, I'll let you know how that's workin' out.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012


Remember how I was going to be all artsy and crafty? Yeah.....  I came on here to post that the desire has not dwindled in the least.  However, the time and energy have.  That's not to say I haven't done ANYTHING productive...I Tyvek'd most of the attic and moved ALL my project-related stuff up there, so that now I actually have a place to BE crafty.  (Remember how I was going to use that sunporch as my lady cave?  Well that changed once I got knocked up and thought that was going to become baby cave.  So it's all painted will come soon......but I'm considering setting up my massage table and getting back to rubbin' naked people.  Losing a kid is expensive, I got some medical bills to pay.)

Aaaaannnyway.....I have a list of things I want to make, I just need to find the motivation to climb the ladder and get to work.  As for today, I've gotten all kinds of errands and chores done...So I think I have some well-deserved book reading in front of me.

P.S. Why do I post on here? I only have 8 friends that might read it.......And even then, why do I bore you with my mundane babbling? Okay, maybe it will be less pointless if I give you tasks. 
Task #1: If I set up my massage room, will you come get a cheap massage from me?
Task #2: What should I make/paint/draw?